Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Back in the Jug


The vodka and pickles are beginning to clear, and I see Mrs Boyo's careful and, I must say, slightly over-tight packing has brought me safely home from Ukraine to a Britain apparently zombified by the sort of flu once administered to Comrade Zhatko.

I'm therefore lying low on night shifts until the plague has passed, and shall share my dank thoughts shortly.

Ukraine's chief exports are steel, missiles, radiation and preedy gorls, so it's fitting that its premiership ought once more to be occupied by Madame Yuliya Tymoshenko - a lady who combines all the best qualities of those commodities.

Our own lady politicians have not been faring so well - Harriet Harman's facing questions over her deputy leadership campaign, Lady Thatcher is slowly turning into a giant moth, Glenys Bloody Kinnock still hasn't emigrated to Cuba, and Theresa May's secretary must be useless as she never replies to my illustrated letters.

They all need a lesson in campaigning from Madame Tymoshenko, and this Ukrainian folk group shows them how it's done with their song "Yuliya". Take it away, ladies:

39 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

The girls did well but the gigolos in skirts let the side down. A lot of rapid leg-movements, as if there were ferrets up 'em, without actually covering much distance.

I wonder whether these trophy wives are all they're cracked up to be. Does the modern Ukranian women suckle her babies and laugh at her husband's jokes?

M C Ward said...

Now I understand that your penchant for the Ukraine derives not only from volatile potato-based beverages. Budmo!

The Birdwatcher said...

I'm with gorilla bananas one this. He is generous in using the term gigolos for them. Oh for a bunch of Cossack horseman to have come sweeping through on horseback wielding large swords......

No Good Boyo said...

GB, there are two types of Ukrainian women. The krepachka type lives in Western Ukraine, wears braids and big blouses, knits her own house, and suckles and laughs in between washing in her own tears and keeping an eye out for priapic Polish landlords. The second type lives in Kiev, has a krepachka for the suckling, thinks her husband is a joke and devotes herself to shopping, drinking coffee and talking on a tiny mobile phone while cutting up traffic in her 4X4.

mc, the video is no exaggeration - that's what you see in hair salons nationwide every day.

Birdwatcher, you and GB are right about the wimpish toyboys. Ukrainian men are on the whole swashbuckling village-levellers, but their presence in the video would have undermined the message that only a blonde megalomaniac in a pointy bra can sort things out.

dominic said...

I must admit to preferring this one, both visually and, particularly, musically

"Ukraine Is Yuliya" (esp the bit where a young woman in a tracksuit beats up some Eastern Ukrainian oligarchs)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ezivpFRNrYE

(although in some ways the lyrics of the XS number you posted are better, at least in the chorus)

No Good Boyo said...

You're right on both counts, Dominic, although I can't help thinking that the Sporty Spice look isn't very Yuliya. The video is still getting plenty of play on TV in Ukraine, which shows the Tymoshenko honeymoon isn't over yet (that happens when she starts acting like a nutter all over again).

Have we met over at Harry's Place sometime?

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