Thursday, March 03, 2011

Dark Side of the Rainbow


Once in a while lakes in Africa turn themselves over, releasing noxious vapours that kill all life on the shore and turn the countryside into something out of Poe.

Once in a while employers in Britain turn their staff over by getting them to reapply for their jobs, releasing noxious employees into the environment and turning the local Labour Exchange into a Cliff Richard film scripted by Kafka.

I was near alone one evening with such a colleague as he wove his way through the re-application form.

"It's just like the script for an interview, but without the interviewer," he muttered.

"So, in order to get the psychological advantage, does that mean you have to imagine yourself naked while filling it in?" I asked.

"I always imagine myself naked," he added.

Beyond the frosted window something stirred in a distant lake.



74 comments:

Gyppo Byard said...

To aid those who as yet remain untainted by acquaintance with Scaryduck, this video shows him in his younger days as an Italian novelty band drummer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c6KN5DpQS8U

No Good Boyo said...

Fully clothed, I'm glad to say - unless that's some crazy Maori body art he's sporting.

Gorilla Bananas said...

He must be a frustrated streaker. Whatever happened to those pale-bodied fellows who used to
dodge policeman and hurdle the stumps at cricket matches?

No Good Boyo said...

A very 70s-80s phenomenon GB. Still, a great improvement on owl-kicking.

Ron Combo said...

Exactly.

Stay-At-Home Indie-Pop said...

I'd like to re-apply for my job and have my kids interview me for the post of 'primary care-giving parent'. I'd use the opportunity to whine about how much I do for them in the hope they'd start feeling guilty. Not naked, though - if they ever catch a glimpse of me in the dash for the bath, their instinctive reaction is, "Euuuurggggh!"

What were we talking about again?

No Good Boyo said...

Children are the harshest judges, Pop. Arianrhod sees me as an extension of the car designed to effect her portage from child seat to prom-tot birthday party without sullying her tinsely shoes with Berkshire mud. Bendigeidfran regards me as a buoy marking his mother's approximate location. My only hope is to keep them illiterate.

Gadjo Dilo said...

Ah, bastard job bastard application bastard forms. I still fail to get inverviews for jobs for which I am eminently qualified. Perhaps they can smell my nakedness on the paper.

No Good Boyo said...

Gadjo, I can only recommend the following set of examples from Irish clerical documentary "Father Ted" (from 13:15 - apologies for the ads):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFXYxVrMo8s

Gadjo Dilo said...

'This video contains content from Channel 4, who has blocked it in your country on copyright grounds.' If you tell me the name of the episode I can watch a pirated version - don't worry, it's Channel 4 ;-)

No Good Boyo said...

How annoying! So much for the relaxed, Lebowski vibe CH4. I'll see what I can do.

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