Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Mark of The Mole

From the press office of the Cymru Rouge Grievance and Slights Department ("Inventing Dignity"):

It has come to the attention of the Vanguard of the Welsh People's various struggles that an English has begun to perpetuate a stereotypical slander against our brothers, sisters and others in the Tribe of Morgan.

Not content first to denigrate the Prophet Mohammed, the immortal leader of the Muslim people, the buffoon Kes Gray has now slurred our Silurian race with his mole-centric aspersions.

His suggestion that entire the Welsh people, and the Tribe of Morgan in particular, are short, dark, irascible creatures who spend most of their lives underground in no way represents the sunlit European vector of our new Cardiff Bay identity.

It is the will of the Welsh people, as expressed through the inerrant voice of the Cymru Rouge, that this Clarksonite debaser should have his car painted green, assuming that he's man enough to drive (probably a 2CV), and that his car is not already green.

In that event, a darker or lighter hue will be applied, depending on the assessment of the Cymru Rouge Coordination and Accessorising Group ("Peintio'r Byd yn Wyrdd").

Appeals will be heard before sentence is duly carried out anyway.


Huw Samphan (Brawd Rhif Un)
Paul Pot (Brawd Rhif Dau)
Ta Moc Tudor (Brawd Rhif Tri)


The Hitch said...

Is there ANYTHING you Welsh dont have a grievance about?
One minute its coal, then steel , now moles!
"we keep a welcome in the hillsides"
Hidden from the English.

Anonymous said...

I hear the First Minister was absolutely livid. He was expected to make an announcement but he seems to have gone to ground.

Anonymous said...

yeh ... well ... just goes to show how little these multi-culturalists know about the cultures they're so eager to embrace.

Gorilla Bananas said...

Linking the proud Welsh name of Morgan (surname of Organ Morgan, the prophet of Milk Wood) to a blind earth rat is an outrage. It saddens me that the Pottists should have hijacked this noble cause.

No Good Boyo said...

Dear Hitch,

I've referred your question to the Grievances Department of the Cymru Rouge, and they replied as follows:

"If there's once thing that annoys us Welsh, it's being accused of taking umbrage.

"We reserve the right to define a 'welcome in the hillsides' as we see fit.

"Some days that welcome will take the form of a nice cup of tea and a slice of Mam's bara brith.

"Other days it may consist of dancing around a mortician from Birmingham stuffed into a giant wicker corgi, the paint of our Cerys Matthews masks reflecting the glow of his burning BMW.

"This is our truth, etc."

I hope that answers your question.

Ordo, "gone to ground", boom boom! Thanks for giving our campaign more publicity on your web blog too. These slights shall not go unranted-over.

GB, the Cymru Rouge is the sword, shield and turnip-docker of the Welsh people, unie et indivisible, and it is only right that we should hijack this noble cause. We note your expression of support for the Morgans, however, and formally grant you the status of "Fellow Traveller, Grade 1".

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